Had a sexual discord with my girlfriend and I can't go on.

The biggest reason for a woman's frigidity is that she has a bad experience with sex, and then she has not had a chance to express it. Just think about it, if you are really happy, why would you refuse and don't want it?

Some netizens also replied: I believe that girls are really at their peak. It may be that girls' "acting skills" are too good.

I have to say that the comments of netizens are true "A bell is just rung by ya in my mind". The root cause of these misunderstandings and disharmony is still related to the sexual differences between men and women.

In this case, if the man can think about the problem from the perspective of the woman, then many obstacles will be easily solved.

Men and women are living beings with many differences. It is because of these differences that men and women are attracted to each other like the poles of a magnet, longing to be one with each other. However, if we don't understand the differences between the sexes, we won't know how to blend in with each other, and it will be difficult to achieve harmony between sex and love.

What are the biological differences between men and women? What are their different needs? Many seemingly simple problems are not handled well, and more obstacles will arise.

1. Differences in sexual responses

The human sexual response process includes excitation phase, plateau phase, orgasm phase and extinction phase. Each of us must go through the excitement period and the platform period smoothly in the process of sexual behavior, in order to reach the apex of the sex parabola and feel the pleasure of orgasm.

Due to the differences in physiological structure, men and women will have some differences in this process.

The first is that women's excitement period is longer than men's, and men's bodies are like the accelerator of a car, which is on the verge of triggering. The woman's body is more like a tractor, and sometimes the starter will still "turn off" after shaking the starter a few times frantically.

The second is "men are fast and women are slow" during the climax period. If a man is riding a high-speed rail and rushing to the top of this parabola, then a woman is like riding a green train to slowly climb to the top.

The last point is that men experience a "refractory period" after their peak, during which they cannot be sexually aroused again. And there is no such period in the female sexual response process where women can peak again immediately after one peak. Men don't have this ability physically.

2. Differences in sexual desire

Sexologists have found that there are cyclical changes in the strength of human sexual desire, and there are gender differences in this periodicity.

According to the observations of British scholars, men's libido changes in a cycle of 15 days, while women's changes in a cycle of 27 days, and each cycle has high tide days and low tide days.

Among them, it is difficult for men and women to completely coincide with the high tide days and low tide days, so the sexual desires of both sides are often out of sync.

If the two sides do not reconcile this difference, it may cause some misunderstandings and affect the intimate relationship.

3. Differences in sexual attitudes

Men and women do not exclude sex. In today's society, more women and men are beginning to know how to explore orgasm. Attitudes towards sex are starting to become positive for both men and women.

Their differences are mainly reflected in the control of love and sex. According to a survey, 80% of girls' first nights are out of love, and 80% of boys are to satisfy desire and curiosity.

So, in terms of sex, women are more likely to associate it with love, and men are more likely to strip love from sex.

4. Differences in sexual enjoyment

In the process of hugging and kissing, most men keep their eyes open, while more women keep their eyes closed. The explanation for this phenomenon by sexologists is that this is the result of the different priorities of men and women in their sexual enjoyment.

From the point of view of the stimulating effect of sensory organs on sex, women's perception of touch is stronger than that of men.

Women close their eyes are not just because they are shy, but actually intentionally cut off the information from vision and experience the pleasure of touch more concentratedly.

For men, on the contrary, visual stimulation is more important than touch. The appearance, posture and expression of women can easily arouse men's admiration and desire, resulting in the dramatic effect of "love at first sight".

This is also one of the reasons why men like to turn on the lights and women like to "operate in the dark" during sex.

5. Differences in orgasm

Male peaks come quickly and last for a short time, while female peaks come slowly and last for a long time. Americans once used MRI to record the brain wave activity of men and women at their peak, and found that men are like light bulbs, ejaculation instantly lights up, and the lights go out when they are done. Women, on the other hand, have a sense of pleasure that cannot be dissipated for a long time.

Another point is that due to differences in physiology, cultural differences and lack of skills, it is much more difficult for most women to achieve the peak than men, and many women may be looking for the peak throughout their lives. In order to meet the needs of women, you can use sex toys appropriately to warm up your relationship with your partner. For example, this rose toy can both suck and thrust. 

6. Differences in sexual norms

In the long development process of human society, a deep-rooted "gender norm" has been formed, which invisibly constrains the sexual behavior of men and women.

Men can be diligent, but not women; men can be direct, women must be subtle; men must be active, women must be passive; men who value emotions are not strong, women who value emotions are worthy of praise, and so on.

All kinds of "double standards" are subtly internalized by men and women, which in turn guide them to behave differently in the process of sexual behavior.